1. When it's a mind-blowing, bed-rattling orgasm you're after, keeping it
simple is absolutely key. Sure, wild, crazy,
never-knew-my-body-could-bend-that-way booty keeps your lust life
exciting, but if the goal of the moment is to break pleasure records,
you have to stick to the basics. "Trying to accomplish complicated
acrobatics distracts you from the sex itself, putting your focus on how
you can contort yourself, rather than on just experiencing the
sensations," explains sex educator Dorian Solot, coauthor of
I (Heart) Female Orgasm. "When you want to climax, the simplest positions are often also the
best positions,
and with a few modifications, you can make them even more orgasm
inducing than they already are." Don't worry, we'd never leave you
hanging. Here, Cosmo custom-designed some of the carnal classics to make
sure you always hit the high notes.
2. You'll never see missionary position the same way again. "While on your
back, put a pillow under your butt, lift your hips, and bring your legs
up and back toward your shoulders, as though you're folding in half,"
says Solot. This move allows him better ease of thrusting and deeper
penetration — a perk for both of you. Plus, it can stimulate your
G-spot. But consider this a warm-up — you're getting the zone primed for
a more intense orgasm. Once your G-spot feels sufficiently stroked, put
your legs down and have him get into coital-alignment-technique (CAT)
position. "He's on top, but he lifts his pelvic bone upward, aligning it
with your clitoris," says sex therapist Gloria Brame, PhD. "Then he
rocks against the area until you peak." "The legs-up position is a slow
burn that brings you to the brink and increases sensitivity. Then the
addition of clitoral rubbing takes you over the edge in a bigger way
than if you had done CAT alone," adds Brame.
3. You've probably tried an all-fours pose before (at least, we hope you
have!). But while mentally the doggie-style position has great bad-girl
benefits, in order to make it actually orgasmic, you need to modify it a
bit. "Lie on your stomach, lifting your butt slightly so he can enter
you," suggests Solot. "Your partner can prop himself up with his hands
in a push-up position or lie on top of you." Not only does this facedown
configuration provide increased friction as he moves in and out, but
you can gently grind your clitoral area against the bed as well.
4. With all the twisting and bending that goes on, sometimes sex can feel
more like a cardio workout than a pleasurefest. That's why it's
important to have at least one relaxed orgasm — inducing position in
your repertoire. Such as this: "While you're on your back, he should lie
on his side, turned toward you," explains Solot. "Swing both legs over
his hips and thighs, making a bridge over them." Then, just let him
gently thrust into you. If it takes you a while to climax, this pose is
ideal. "It's not very aerobic, so the sex can go on for a long time
without either of you tiring out," says Laura Berman, PhD, director of
the Berman Center and author of
The Passion Prescription. "When you want to climax, it's easy to touch yourself or he can use his top hand to stimulate you."
5. Girl-on-top tends to be a go-to for achieving orgasm...and for good
reason! "It allows you to dictate the pace and depth of thrusting, but
mainly, you have easy access to your clitoris," says Berman. "You can
touch your C-spot, have him touch it, or rub against his pubic bone to
achieve orgasm." But you can up the ante by literally pulling a 180.
Twist around so you're pointed toward his feet in reverse cowgirl
position. "Instead of straddling him, put your legs together, feet flat
between his legs," suggests Brame. The benefits of this are twofold:
With your legs together, the fit is even tighter, making the sensations
more intense. Plus, there's increased G-spot stimulation, which combined
with your own clitoral strokes, makes for an explosive orgasm.
6. In some cases, a simple change of scenery can aid in achieving orgasm.
For this move, you'll need a kitchen table — one that comes to your
man's waist. "Lie down on the table with your butt near the edge,"
suggests Solot. "He enters you while standing between your legs, holding
on to your hips for leverage." You can rest your feet on his shoulders
or on the edge of the table. Because he's standing, his hands are free
to stroke your body," says Brame. "And he's at a perpendicular angle,
rather than right on top of you, making it easier for him to touch your
clitoris, unobstructed." To up your odds of orgasming, clench and lift
up your butt, which will increase the pelvic tension and blood flow to
the area.
7. This one's always a fan favorite — he sits and you straddle him so
you're face-to-face. "You have a lot of control over the speed, angle,
and motion because you can use your arms and legs to help you maneuver,"
says Berman. "Rather than just moving up and down, which can be
especially tiring for you, sway forward and back, rubbing your clitoral
area against him." In addition to the freedom of movement, there are a
few other benefits to this booty move. "If you lean back just a little
bit, you'll get greater G-spot stimulation and he'll be able to play
with your clitoris," Brame explains. Plus, your breasts will be
perfectly aligned with his mouth, adding a whole other layer to the
sexual experience.
8. Obviously, you know emotional attachment is essential to achieving
orgasm with your guy. And there's no configuration that's more snuggly
than the spoon. To assume the position, simply lie on your side, your
guy scooted up behind you. Rather than move in and out, he should stay
inside you, gently thrusting against the front wall of your vagina.
"Aside from fulfilling your cuddly needs, it provides consistent
stimulation to your G-spot, which is key for achieving orgasm from
intercourse," Berman points out. "Since he may not be able to penetrate
you as deeply though, guide his hand around your hot spot." And just
think: Once you've both climaxed, you'll be in perfect postcoital
position as well.
9. When it comes to achieving supreme pleasure, being in the right mind-set is half the battle.
Let your thoughts wander.
It helps to transport yourself mentally to a sexy place. Fantasize that
you're getting it on in a lust-inspiring locale or even with another
man, like a hot trainer at your gym or, hell, Justin Timberlake. No
guilt — it doesn't mean you want to cheat on your guy.
Strengthen your senses.
Certain smells and sounds can have a Pavlovian affect on your libido.
Think about what puts you in the mood, and then designate an enhancer
that will signal to your brain and body that it's time to get naughty.
For example, before sex, put on a sultry jazz CD.
Be selfish. Worrying
too much about your guy's pleasure means you wind up ignoring your own.
So silence the inner monologue of "How am I doing?" and simply enjoy
the experience. Otherwise, it becomes more work than play.
Stay on course.
A stressful day's memories can still manage to sneak up on you, even
when you're mid-mattress session. To stay in the moment, try to focus
your thoughts purely on the physical and pay attention to how every
touch, lick, and stroke feels.
-Dory Larrabee
SOURCE: Psychotherapist Kathleen Cervenka, PhD, author of In the Mood, Again