If you're stressed, whether by your job or by something more
personal, the first step to feeling better is to identify the cause.
The most unhelpful thing you can do is turn to something unhealthy to help you cope, such as smoking or drinking.
“In
life, there’s always a solution to a problem,” says Professor Cary
Cooper, an occupational health expert at the University of Lancaster.
“Not taking control of the situation and doing nothing will only make
your problems worse.”
He says the keys to good stress management are building emotional strength, being in control of your situation, having a good social network and adopting a positive outlook.
Be active:
If you have a stress-related problem, physical activity can get you in the right state of mind to be able to identify the causes of your stres
s and
find a solution. “To deal with stress effectively, you need to feel
robust and you need to feel strong mentally. Exercise does that,” says
Cooper.
Exercise won’t make your stress disappear, but it will
reduce some of the emotional intensity that you’re feeling, clearing
your thoughts and enabling you to deal with your problems more calmly.
Take control:
There’s
a solution to any problem. “If you remain passive, thinking, ‘I can’t
do anything about my problem’, your stress will get worse,” says
Professor Cooper. “That feeling of loss of control is one of the main
causes of stress and lack of wellbeing.”
The act of taking control
is in itself empowering, and it's a crucial part of finding a solution
that satisfies you and not someone else. Read tips about how to manage your time.
Connect with people:
A
problem shared is a problem halved. A good support network of
colleagues, friends and family can ease your work troubles and help you
see things in a different way.
“If you don’t connect with
people, you won’t have support to turn to when you need help,” says
Professor Cooper. The activities we do with friends help us relax and we
often have a good laugh with them, which is an excellent stress
reliever.
“Talking things through with a friend will also help you find solutions to your problems,” says Professor Cooper.
Have some ‘me time’:
The
UK workforce works the longest hours in Europe. The extra hours in the
workplace mean that people aren’t spending enough time doing things that
they really enjoy. “We all need to take some time for socialising,
relaxation or exercise,” says Professor Cooper.
He recommends
setting aside a couple of nights a week for some quality "me time" away
from work. "By earmarking those two days, it means you won’t be tempted
to work overtime on those days," he says.
Challenge yourself:
Setting yourself goals and challenges, whether at work or outside, such as learning a new language or a new sport, helps to build confidence. That in turn will help you deal with stress.
“By
constantly challenging yourself you’re being proactive and taking
charge of your life,” says Professor Cooper. “By continuing to learn,
you become more emotionally resilient as a person. It arms you with
knowledge and makes you want to do things rather than be passive, such
as watching TV all the time.”
Avoid unhealthy habits:
Don't
rely on alcohol, smoking and caffeine as your ways of coping. "Men more
than women are likely to do this. We call this avoidance behaviour,"
says Professor Cooper. "Women are better at seeking support from their
social circle."
Over the long term, these crutches won’t solve
your problems. They’ll just create new ones. "It’s like putting your
head in the sand," says Professor Cooper. "It might provide temporary
relief but it won’t make the problems disappear. You need to tackle the
cause of your stress."
Help other people:
Cooper says evidence shows that people who help others, through activities such as volunteering
or community work, become more resilient. “Helping people who are often
in situations worse than yours will help you put your problems into
perspective,” says Professor Cooper. “The more you give, the more
resilient and happy you feel.”
If you don't have time to
volunteer, try to do someone a favour every day. It can be something
as small as helping someone to cross the road or going on a coffee run
for colleagues. Favours cost nothing to do, and you’ll feel better.
Work smarter, not harder:
Good
time management means quality work rather than quantity. Our long-hours
culture is a well-known cause of workplace illness. “You have to get a
work-life balance that suits you,” says Professor Cooper.
Working
smarter means prioritising your work, concentrating on the tasks that
will make a real difference to your work. “Leave the least important
tasks to last,” says Cooper. “Accept that your in-tray will always be
full. Don’t expect it to be empty at the end of the day.”
Be positive
Look
for the positives in life, and things for which you're grateful. Write
down three things at the end of every day which went well or for which
you're grateful.
“People don’t always appreciate what they have,”
says Professor Cooper. “Try to be glass half full instead of glass half
empty,” he says.
This requires a shift in perspective for those who are more naturally pessimistic.
“It
can be done,” he says. “By making a conscious effort you can train
yourself to be more positive about life. Problems are often a question
of perspective. If you change your perspective, you may see your
situation from a more positive point of view.”
Accept the things you can't change:
Changing
a difficult situation isn't always possible. If this proves to be the
case, recognise and accept things as they are and concentrate on
everything that you do have control over.
“If your company is
going under and is making redundancies, there’s nothing you can do about
it,” says Professor Cooper. “There’s no point fighting it. In such a
situation, you need to focus on the things that you can control, such as
looking for a new job.”
